Found on the Contrabass Web site. Thanks Grant.
Musical Offenses, and Corresponding Fines
Bad Taste |
Equipment Violations | |||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Obnoxiously showy warm-up | $15 | Dropping mute | $10 | |
| Vibrato on unison passage | $10 | Dropping horn | $50 | |
| Failure to swing | $90 | Dropping dead | $3 | |
| Playing highest possible note during warm-up | $25 | Forgetting pencil | $10 | |
| Practicing multiple tonguing not called for on gig | $10 | Forgetting porno magazines | $99 | |
| Failure to use 3rd valve slide when necessary | $10 | Blaming mistake on bad reed | $35 | |
| Being told by Leader to play louder | $75 | Blaming mistake on sticky valve | $35 | |
| Taking tuning note up an octave | $20 | Polishing horn on stage | $65 | |
| Playing Bb when band is playing A | $45 |
More Bad Taste | ||
| Blacking out after high note | $10 | Having nicer gig bag than rest of section | $25 | |
Lead Players | Practicing legit style on commercial gig | $15 | ||
| Changing mouthpiece mid-song | $15 | Beginning sentence with "When I played with Kenton" | $99 | |
| Faking section into early entrance | $15 | Wearing white socks with black suit | $15 | |
| Faking self into early entrance | $90 | Looking better than Band Leader | $25 | |
| Asking Leader if it’s OK to take lick up an octave | $25 | Playing better than Leader | $1 | |
| Asking Leader if it’s OK to take lick down an octave | $75 |
Basic Stupidity | ||
| Missing last note on "In the Mood" | $95 | Drunkenness on gig | $10 | |
Non-Lead Players | Sobriety on gig | $75 | ||
| Missing entrance when lead player drops out on unison | $25 | Sitting next to Leader at pre/post gig meal | $85 | |
| Hanging over when lead player drops out on last chord | $85 | Riding to gig with Leader | $95 | |
| Attempting unassigned high note | $90 | Pretending to be friends with Bone players | $25 | |
| Asking lead player what mouthpiece he uses | $25 | Actually being friends with Bone player | $50 | |
| Pointing out to lead player that guy on record took it up | $50 | Dating Bone player | $95 | |
| Attempting to out-screech lead player | $30 | Playing on a Jet-Tone mouthpiece | $15 | |
| Successfully out-screeching lead player | $95 | Playing an Accordion | $99 | |
| Continuously asking "Where are we?" | $30 | Reporting income to IRS | $99 | |
Apparently compiled by a trumpet player.
The Bis Key Chronicles 
just wondering how much you owe?? you dont seem to have included that info…lol ;))how long is it now for your trip… Norway isn’t it? hugsdebsxXx
I’ll never tell. ;o)It’s a Scandinavian cruise including stops in St. Petersburg and Poland. It can’t come soon enough. Thanks for stopping by Witchy. :o)